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Messages - n3ur0h@ck

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Herb Info and Use / Re: Chaga mushrom (inonotus obliquus)
« on: June 22, 2017, 06:40:15 am »
Due to very hot sunny weather and having no serious skin pigmentation and not liking chemical sunprotection, I've been looking into making my own sunscreen. And the idea is to somehow get the melanin of the chaga into coconut oil and put it on the skin. Anyone tried something like this before?

Tried to boil in water and add coconut oil to extract, but melanin stays in the water. So I'll try directly infusion it into liquid coconut oil. It will also give a nice color to the skin. I'm really curious if this is going to work...

Herb Info and Use / Re: Chaga mushrom (inonotus obliquus)
« on: June 15, 2017, 05:24:08 am »
Yeah same here, break it up with a hammer, then with the electric coffee grinder to top it off with a long simmering brew. Took me a while to find out it's reusable several times.

It also provides melanin, ridiculous amounts of SOD and much more. Too bad I don't read Russian, they have done a lot of studies into it.

Got this idea to try to find a spot were I wan't to apply for helping out with the harvest. Like WWOOFing. They grow in my region but are weak due to the lack of frost.

But I can't open that chart. The url seems to be invalid.


Herb Info and Use / Chaga mushrom (inonotus obliquus)
« on: June 14, 2017, 05:57:27 am »
I'm looking for a place to start a topic on the use of chaga mushroom and it's effects in the line of teacher/ healing plants. Though it's not entheogenic in any discernable way. But it's a very powerful healing agent and can possibly act in synergy with kambo and it's allies.

Been using it for a while now. It helps me recover when I'm totally fatigued. Along with diet and selfstudy it allows me to get out of it. However it has no clear teaching voice. What it does is take away the sickness. It makes me feel normal. Whenever things go for the better, I start to notice nausea accompanying drinking large quantities. Then it's time to stop consuming it. I followed up with kambo when this happened last time.

Still in the process of making a vodka extract of it. This is said to contain another spectrum of active ingredients. I'm curious as to what these will do, if noticable.

Journals / Ordeals / Re: kambo after 2 years
« on: June 14, 2017, 05:38:00 am »
I'm looking for some advice on how to proceed along. It's because the previous condition of CFS has returned. Today it's back in full swing. This means waking up tired and having no energy at all. Also previous injuries flaring up and psychological negative spiral.

At first glance now: It seems that I've overlooked something. Although things were improving. There was something neglected and now it has found an opportunity to reassert itself. The lowest cornerstone of (liver) enzyme detox absence proved useful information to setup a diet that improve the fatigue symptoms. However there is something else, or more causes that on the physical lead to this fatigue.

What I found, that after kambo I felt great, had energy and was motivated for a great many things. Using the momentum to steer into the direction of healing & surpassing the issue. At the same time I noticed it also felt great to repeat past behavior that has always been hand in hand the fatigued state. That's why I wrote not being entirely happy about that 'kambo brings out the original personality'.

So I avoided it at first. But a few days later it came back in another guise and this time it carried me away. I involved somebody else with my 'problem'. Caused distress for when I saw it, it was already done and this distress was like the gateway back to the issue.

Yesterday would have been the day for session 2. Were it, I sabotaged it in the usual manner, by losing a lot of energy during sleep. Maybe it's also for releasing energies that otherwise cannot exit. But the point is that it's a no go for kambo.

Next my lower back injury of months past flares up. Right now I feel not good, like worse than before. Smoking a lot of cannabis. This inhibits the tendency to get carried away but may also weaken the ability to do so naturally.

So how to deal with this?

The usual strategy is to sit it out. Take it as a cold shower and don't flinch. Wait for the next moonphase. Attempt it again but also have patience for if sabotaged wait even longer.

I've picked up studying the yoga sutras of Patanjali again. The ideas and insights expressed help a lot to make sense of this deep conscious programming that flowers in subsconscious self-injury, sabotage and negative attitude. Also I'm amazed at time at how tenacious it can be. But overwhelmed by it.

Journals / Ordeals / Re: kambo after 2 years
« on: June 12, 2017, 06:52:50 am »
As to how to cool. Got an idea about that.

First to chill the intestine tract by ingesting aloe vera pulp, fresh from the leaves. A little while later allow residual toxins to bind by ingesting a kind of edible earth or clay. Meditation is good as well, so is sleep.

The residual heat is much like the heat referred to as 'tapas' in the yoga sutras and other scriptures that talk about ascetic practice (which is also referred to as tapas in sanskrit). Yesterday I did about 3,5 hours of yoga in 3 sessions (with some food). At the end I was having a similar kind of heat. Doing such prolonged sessions takes some determination in the beginning but becomes easy at the end.

Kambo itself is very fiery and swift. The similar effect of yoga is much slower and takes a lot of time to build up. Right now I am considering to do a second session like this week, or to wait for the next moonphase.

Edit: Was reading some topic on treating CFS. I have something to say about that, from my own experience. Seems that lately I might be on the verge of breaking through this state of near constant fatigue.

The point is that whatever I did, the underlying condition was not resolved and it turns out this is due to genetic dispostion in regard to detoxing compounds, like alkaloids, hormones, pesticides, heavy metals. Basically endogenic and exogenic compounds in these rough classes.

So I would lapse right back after say doing a green coffee enema, liver cleanse or whatever. Kambo was left out deliberaty due to this. This was why I choose to avoid kambo for 2 years (through gut feeling). Now I finally figured out a lot of the foods which I avoid in order to stack things in my favour,. This way the underlying cause, ie genetic disinformation, is circumvented. Without this I might be able to do kambo once a week, have a period of energy - but in the end would literally burn up my reserves which is no long term solution.

Recently I read a book on Xi Sui Jing. The book is by Yang Jing-Mwing and is called something like 'Qigong the secret of youth'. It covers a section on a set of techniques called Xi Sui Jing.

It is amazing how well the Chinese knew stuff. It comes down to a technique to stimulate testosterone production through various means.

I recommend reading up on this stuff, it's a viable alternative to the herbal/ pharmacological approach!

Journals / Ordeals / kambo after 2 years
« on: June 09, 2017, 06:25:00 am »
Hi. For a long time I abstained from kambo, just over 2 years actually. 3 days ago I finally broke the ice and was really ecstatic because of that. Things are settling down now, but I still like to share some insights gained from it.

First of all I wasn't able to get this feeling, that it was okay to proceed with a session. All this time I was on the verge of doing it, but then aborting for I just was either too tired or noticed how I unconsciously sabotaged my attempt. This I didn't understand at first. However gradually I uncovered some subconscious issues that needed to be brought to light in order to get there.

It was like a a house that time after time just collapsed through a fault in the foundation. The house is your life, health and wellbeing. Each time I got it almost up, roofing it or wanting to start decorating or invite guests, whatever. The whole thing would collapse and I had to start all over. I found out the cause was foundation. Meaning, subconscious or unconscious issues that were preventing and sabotaging the effort. This continuous experience halted kambo and it was good to take a break for I would have wrecked things by carrying on.

What I found was a lot of debris related to ancestors or my own line of incarnations or whatever deposits might be there. Still not sure about all of it, but some things are very clear now. It took a lot of pain to be able to open eyes for these things. The most profound and lowest stone in the foundation proved to be a sort of cornerstone: phase 1 & 2 detoxification. It seems like my code says 'do not produce this enzyme through these and these amino acids' instead of 'produce it'. There are a lot of genes that code for detox enzymes and if you have this negation often you're left with little room for removing toxins. So they build up.

Kambo is ofcourse perfect for cleansing toxins, however the buildup wrecks the innate ability and if you can't address this. How are you able to cope with a harsh ride like kambo? I was tired all the time, still am often but things are getting better. What I gained was the knowledge to circumvent a lot of disability in detoxing through diet and practices. Last few I weeks I finally found the corner of this cornerstone and things sped up. So 3 days ago I felt confident that time had come for kambo.

I was a bit worried that 2 years might totally dissolve the link with the frog. That I would need to go somewhere to reinitiate myself. This proved to be nonsense.

Just 5 dots was all that it took. I had drank enough water, smudged and talked to my kambo stick for a long time. Basically covered the basic ritual. Within seconds I was vomiting. What a relief! To know that this response was still remembered was very nice. I can remember the first few times I couldn't puke. I did feel terrible and went through this phase were I wanted to renounce everything just because it all felt so bad. My puke looked good though, from light to dark green. No orange or darker colors. Took that as a good sign.

At the end I ran short of water but only a little and all in all it seemed good to cover all the needs before you start instead of having to force to drink during this ride.

What struck me was the distinct appearance of my unpolished raw and original personality. Like the root on which I cultivated all these refinements. They were blasted off and what remains was very familiar. It was back to the basics. Not entirely happy about that. However this is were I once started from, like the fool in tarot in a sense.

Another one was the psychedelic state that came after. Though not tripping as on psychedelics but this telltale immersement in the here and now which was very much like removing a schism that is normally present in waking state. The way things came in was just very different though I was still sober in way. A subtle psychedelic effect...

Last observation was this kind of heat. Through a lot of tai chi and yoga practice I've come to understand through feeling the yin/ yang - water/ fire - hot/ cold balance. There was sense of fieriness afterward. This was a bit rajasic in ayurvedic terms, where the kambo itself is very sattvic (bitter first, sweet afterward). I wondered if there are certain herbs to cool it down. Might be that aloe vera helps (by ingesting) I didn't try that it but will next time.

Was very tired afterward. I wanted to go for a sauna but had to wait. Just too much for one day. Things are getting better now. The insights gained over the past 2 years prove very helpful and I have the intention to re-establish a relationship with psychedelics sooner or later. Kambo has at least proved to be a very healthy tool and I will use it again soon I hope.

By the way. Does anyone care about lunar cycles with kambo use? I always have this feeling that it should between first quarter and full moon. That this is the proper time for it. But I am sceptical about the whole lunar influence thing. Am of the opinion the moon is an imposter trying to imitate the sun but is just a poor reflection of it. Like popular music is a poor imitation of real artistry. Another question is, what is the agenda of the frog? What does it want. It channels the forest through the insects and reflects amphibic consciousness, what does that bring out in us?

Complementary Modalities / Re: Kambo Plus Enema
« on: January 20, 2016, 09:57:18 am »
I have a recipe:

Cook about 1/3 to 2/3 gram iboga rootbark in little over ,5 liters of water. Do this with a little bit of lemon or lime juice and some celtic sea salt.

Next stop cooking and immediately add a half table spoon green unroasted coffee and close the container.

Let it cool down till body temperature.

Then administer as enema. Combine with oil pulling, preferably coconut oil.

Yes this is about rooting things out and more in light of computer analogy, having root access (is the hallmark of a mature brain). Finding and fixing the root cause of panema is my motivation behind this writing.

Brought me back to the frog in a way. Did the frog have a similar problem? Ie a sort of mutation or viral intruder in it's basic coding that caused it to generate massive quantities of venom and being killed by it. By changing something about that gene, maybe changing some genetic flags, the frog managed to have it the other way round and protect itself. So while still having some quirky strange peculiarity, it made a sort of invulnerability.

I get the feeling this is a key insight, but if this is how the frog came to be is ofcourse pure speculation... (but I want some connection back to the frog  ;) )

The topic is not about the actual use of kambo but more about the background of why kambo is used and also how something like panema can be seen from other angles. It is based on personal experience, but accounts of actual facts have been left out and instead this focuses on the process and its outcomes.

Last year was my first without having continuous trouble from external sources. During this year I've been sorting out things, mostly from the past, for it obstructed the present. Through this sorting out I've come to know a few things.

During this year I've come to understand there is a deep seated source of conflict in me that in the past continuously resonated with ongoing trouble from external sources. It used to be the kind of situations that were just random and could happen to anyone. Yet I found myself in a continuous string of these kind of events. One after another and the only thing they had in common was that I was the recipient of the experience.

Put simply it was extreme bad luck. And it was precisely the kind of bad luck that upset me so terribly I found myself nothing short of a complete crisis on all levels. In effect there was no going back and till this day I feel strongly no stone has to be left unattended and each harbours a scorpion with it's own poison. They all strike, deliver and in effect have me transmute the venom.

Each time I did kambo this would initiate a relative peaceful period without any serious incidents. Some things were long lasting and did less damage, others were incidental and just kept at bay. Yet after a while the effect would wear off and the random bad luck recurring. I do not want to go into detail on the bad luck, stating experiences individually for this is just the kind of talk that will derail the whole topic. Instead I will take out some recurring string of events that had a definite cohesion through the randomness. For a long while I would run into the same person for days on end on different times and places. Just I am doing my business and suddenly there he or she is again. After a while it would stop, but not long for somebody else would take place and I run into that person in the same fashion. Of course some noticed and even accused me of stalking. All the while I did nothing whatsoever in that fashion, just seeing to my own amazement that these kind of rendezvous were possible. In the end I had to conclude that I was the one this was happening to and somehow it had to do with me...

Anyway I went through years of consistent bad luck and finally moved to a place where for a year now no serious incident has reached me. Instead I found myself attracting a lot of attention on the street. Basically people seek me out for conflict. And it are those that have led me to examine what in me that resonates so much with this. Basically I have a conflict of some degree. Each time I made a move to address something it would intensify for a while. So when I came to realize the conflict was there, for weeks I had nothing but encounters with bad tempered people on daily basis.

The next level was to take a look at the energies that fed this conflict. Though I can't be certain about anything in this regard, there are deep undercurrents that have nothing to do with me whatsoever but are the residual of my ancestors for example. Or they are emotions deposited by having to listen to my parents conflicts. At a certain point I do add some to the pocket, like emotions I never addressed myself. So to work on this angle I started writing down my experiences. Just tried to went through everything that happened and mostly about how I felt about it.

In a half year I wrote down a lot of storyline and reread it for finding out the emotional content and especially where I didn't want to look. So there I went deeper and tried to get into the emotions and process them. I'm still at this. But in the period I did manage to find some hidden context between the lines that not only served to see the conflict in a better light, but also get a grip on how it came to be that I found myself so attracted to series of random bad luck events.

First thing was that the conflict is based upon the tension between being in the world and not being allowed to be me. Put simply my ego is not allowed to exist and the physical existence of my body is tolerated but under serious tension as well. I've had some bad time in my early youth and unconsciously assumed that the way people treated me had to do with me, in other words it was my fault they didn't treat me well. Even more concise, I started to identify myself with their reflection in me, put simply cause I was not allowed to be myself. This way I could still adhere a bit to it, but on the other hand would technically not be me. So conflict flares up.

Now subsequently I started to take decision like 'I will never show my anger anymore' so that nobody could punish me for showing my anger. The same with grief 'I will never cry anymore' so nobody will have the opportunity to do harm this way. This decision I did remember more or less exact. The last was 'I shall never be happy' for I didn't want to give anyone the opportunity to wipe the smile of my face. And I have been true to my word. Crying can only occur after a serious beating or other painful incident and only very meager. Anger only comes when I have to be angry for some else's interest.

So this still does not provide a suitable narrative for handling the structural bad luck attraction. How on earth can all of this account for it? For all I know most of these things are very common and it won't stand in the way of love, luck or success anyway. You can be perfectly successful and never look back at the shit in your youth. But for me it was another step on the way. A few weeks ago a new door opened.

Basically I reread and rewrote some of my experiences and found that whatever I wanted to view it, it stayed impossible to find any meaning in it. In came down to the fact I had some trouble due to someone else and I couldn't accept it, change it or go away from it. I did all in my power and it didn't change anything. Whenever I went somewhere the energy of this situation was still with me and attracted something similar. Accepting it was like choosing to corrupt yourself. I was stuck on it for a long time. Finally it dawned on me that on the surface I was trying to fight it, but what I was really fighting was my unwillingness to accept that there was nothing whatsoever to be done about it. Deep down I felt terribly powerless and knowing that was being the victim of this. But would not, could not and should not accept it anyhow. It was a big no no.

In light of this a narrative framed itself. Namely that at the core of my personality is identification with something that does not belong there, but has been there from the beginning. That way I've misunderstood it as a part of me and unconsciously assimilated it and grew my personality from that assimilation. From the start it has caused conflict on the issue of being and been allowed to, cause it is not allowed to be. It is a invalid intruder in my system. An alien, the other, whatever you want to call it. It has upset the relation of self and other in such a way that I cannot and shall not be for I am identified with what is other in me. This intruder fights for survival but only in time, for it cannot exists in the now. It resonates with all that keeps you out of the now and opens all gates to sent out subliminal messages to attract more of it's like.

The easiest way to state it is using a computer analogy. Imagine a computer that while it's being build is infected with a virus. When the OS is formed it mistakes this virus as it's own components, but the anti virus program knows all along and tells the rest of the OS that this component is invalid, a virus and has no right to be there at all. But the OS as a whole conflicts on this, cause it has identified itself with this component and if this component is invalid then the whole is invalid as well. So hence the conflict. In the meantime the virus opens all ports and continuously sends out messages to attract intruders.

With this narrative I can address the random bad luck in such a way that it makes sense. It shows that there is a way to the root cause and that permanent dissolution is possible. Though it might never leave the system, it can be rendered inert or reversed that it no longer is the enemy but becomes a guardian. How this plays out is still to come.

Introductions / Re: Hello ! Autism & Kambo
« on: June 21, 2015, 09:53:22 am »
I have no idea when a young person is ready for receiving kambo treatment. Maybe it's good to find out what in traditional circles this age is, but age does not say everyting cause it's also a cultural things. It's good to be careful on this.

It might help relieve autistic symptoms. Even cure them for a bit, but I'm not sure. This is mostly unexplored territory, so unless you find a healer who's certain and experienced in this light, you're be facing the unknown. No clinical studies or even the slightest indication it may be beneficial. Yet the frog is miraculous and it wouldn't surprise it would be great benefit.

Even if you keep the treatment solely for yourself, it may benefit your son by being able to better understand his needs...

Just my two cents here...

Introductions / Re: Hello ! Autism & Kambo
« on: June 10, 2015, 07:54:18 am »
Is the treatment for you or your eldest son?

Journals / Ordeals / Re: 1 week whole
« on: June 06, 2015, 01:47:05 pm »
I feel compelled to reply. Basic energy seems to resonate in certain ways...

Being in thirties now I've gone through much agony due to not understanding or knowing how to proceed. Kambo is like a fix then that sets things right so I've got a chance to work things out.

Basically I see this in your post, things I have learned or am still learning...

* I am doing stuff that isn't what I'm to do.

* There is much set in motion at an early age in a light of being disconnected from who I am.

- sorry if that's vague... and I speak for myself as that is the most honest way of saying this -

So these two things interact and kambo is a direct way of ending this spiral (for a while). In the meantime I am to find out what it is that I need to do. The longer I spend not doing what I'm to do, the worse the symptoms get. Deep down I know, but at the same time don't see it, don't want to see or turn it around. All gets agony except some tiny strand. The other thing is to find out how it started, so I remember my early years as good as possible, every detail and write it down. Next let it ferment, something will come up and then look at what it has to say about that.

Well it's not so much about kambo but more of the rest you say fakeHuman. It's that thing that I learned when you refuse to be yourself or do what's there to do, you're not human so that's what fakeHuman says to me.


General Discussion / Re: Kambo Self-Administration
« on: April 15, 2015, 06:58:16 am »
self administration definately requires courage.

it's more easy to have someone do it for you.

what i'm interested in, how much fasting beforehand?

i've experimented somewhat with it, from no fasting to 3 days fast prior.

and stangely sometimes when fasting 3 days it's effects are minimal with like 9 dots.

another time i had such a strong effect with 9 dots that it made no difference to no fast at all.

usually i have strong effects when not fasting, then the purges are the most intensive...

Complementary Modalities / Re: Ojé Resin
« on: February 10, 2015, 08:08:51 am »
Ficus insipida (Moraceae), ‘ojé’ or ‘renaco’, is used for its latex in
some parts of the n.w. Amazon. When consumed under diet, it is said to
be a very powerful plant-teacher. The latex is also a strong purgative; it is
usually taken for this purpose mixed with ‘aguardiente’ liquor [2tsp per
bottle], in a dose of 1tsp 3 times a day. It is also sometimes added to aya-
huasca [see Banisteriopsis], and contains biphenylhexahydroindolizines
and phenanthroxoindolizines. F. ruiziana [‘renaco’] is also sometimes
used in ayahuasca, and contains triterpenes and furocoumarins. The juice
of the shoots of Ficus spp. may be taken under a 6 month diet, to be able
to “travel under the water”, where shamanic knowledge is learned (Bear
& Vasquez 2000; Desmarchelier et al. 1996; Luna 1984; McKenna et al.
1995; Schultes & Raffauf 1990). A Ficus sp. known as ‘renaquilla’ is used
by the Shipibo, who ingest it under special diet conditions, so that the fe-
male spirit of the plant will teach them to heal in their dreams (Luna &
Amaringo 1991). F. anthelmintica fruit is taken in Brazil as an aphrodisiac
and memory stimulant, and F. atrox latex is used as an ingredient of one
‘curare’ arrow poison (Schultes & Raffauf 1990). The Nkopo of PNG use
F. gul [‘kildsek’] in their initiations, and they use another Ficus sp. [‘kwa-
nam’] in rituals to achieve harmony with natural forces (Schmid 1991). In
that continent, the use of Ficus spp. in rain magic and to combat sorcery is
widespread (Paijmans ed. 1976). The Mbowamb of Mt. Hagen eat leaves
of a Ficus sp. [‘mbon’] to protect against the ‘spell of death’ (Stopp 1963).
On Rossel Island, near PNG, F. subnervosa leaves are chewed as a betel
nut substitute [see Areca] (Thomas 2001a). In Africa, Zulu men drink a
decoction of F. soldanella bark as a ‘strengthening tonic’ (Watt & Breyer-
Brandwijk 1932). In some parts of Africa, unspecifi  ed parts of F. sur have
been used as a homicidal poison (De Smet 1998). The phenethylamine al-
kaloid synephrine has been obtained from the ‘banyan tree’, F. bengalen-
sis [0.0081% (w/w) from leaves] (Wheaton & Stewart 1970), which is
considered sacred in India and Sri Lanka (Schultes & Raffauf 1990).

Here's some additional info from Garden of Eden by S Voogelbreinder.

Initial experience using the latex suggest to be very cautious and adhere to diet strictly...

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